freakyboy.com

Yes, there is a God. I went to the fridge for another beer and returned to my desk to finish some important stuff on the computer. I picked up the finished beer bottle to dispose and lo and behold, it was not empty. God all freaking mighty, I have been chosen a prophet. Only a God (or should I just write "God" versus "a God") would add beer to an empty bottle, now allowing me a new beer and half an old beer; previously thought to have been drunk. He loves me. Now follow me. He wants me to speak to you for him. I am God's greatest prophet (and, conveniently, his last) - thank you. All praise God; and me of course - since I am his greatest prophet.

Thank you, I mean thank me...